Dear Mothers,
It is fitting that Mother’s Day falls in the same month as Mental Health Awareness Month. For many caregivers, it can be all too easy to forget about taking care of ourselves when we are so focused on caring for others. However, the truth is that self-care is an essential part of maintaining good mental health and overall well-being. This is because effective self-care and well-tended mental health have one very important element in common: boundaries. Setting healthy boundaries is an act of self-respect, self-love, and self-care. It means taking responsibility for our own needs and making sure that they are met.
Why Good Boundaries Make For Good Self-Care
For many of us, setting boundaries can be a challenge. We may be concerned that committing to firm limits will be viewed by others as indulgent or downright selfish; that resolving to honor stricter boundaries may disappoint the people who count on us, causing conflict in our relationships.
Yet taking care of ourselves is one of the most selfless things we can do. If we don’t set boundaries, we run the risk of becoming exhausted, overwhelmed, and resentful. But when we prioritize this important aspect of our own mental and emotional well-being, we are better able to show up for our loved ones, our work, and our communities. Adhering to boundaries demonstrates that we respect ourselves by embracing and owning our needs and expectations. It also shows that we respect others by honoring their boundaries, their needs and expectations as well!
Mindfulness and Boundaries
Mindfulness is an important part of boundary-setting. After all, it takes a decent helping of self-awareness and reflection to understand where our boundaries should actually be. Mindfulness is additionally helpful when it comes to clearly communicating our limits to others. By practicing mindfulness, we tend to become better listeners, increasing our awareness of others’ needs and feelings. It helps us approach boundary-setting with empathy, understanding, and clarity, reducing the likelihood of misunderstandings and conflicts. When we have strong communication skills and are able to set and maintain healthy boundaries, we can cultivate more meaningful, authentic relationships. When necessary, this also means we may navigate conflicts with others with greater ease.
The Lasting Benefits of Boundaries
With firm boundaries, we can make time for ourselves to prioritize self-care. This can be as simple as taking a few minutes each day to disengage from the world; turn off our phones and relax. (Or maybe turn on the phone and connect with a friend.) It might mean scheduling time to meditate or practice deep breathing or to reach out and keep regular appointments with a therapist or counselor.
With Boundaries, We Can Unapologetically Celebrate Ourselves!
With love and admiration,
A fellow caregiver